Chaos Calmer Cream - by Parlor Games

When you can't catch your breath, catch a break, or catch up... You need Chaos Calmer. With it's proprietary blend of GABA, L-Theanine, and Magnesium, it takes you from Nervous Nelly to Wonder Woman: y'know, calm, cool and collected (and kicking ass). GABA is a calming neurotransmitter, Magnesium helps relax muscles and helps produce GABA in the brain, and L-theanine is an amino acid which has a calming, grounding effect on the body and mind without making you feel drowsy. Chaos Calmer takes your days from bedlam to bliss. Great for everyone over the age of 1.

What happens to the brain when we are short on sleep? Well, brain fog, memory issues, mood disruption, as well as elevated cortisol, and a greater likelihood to reach for sugary treats to stay energized.

At bedtime, we fall into a sea of pillows and blankets, sure that we will drift off and wake the next day feeling like a Goddess... Instead, you lie in bed tossing and turning for hours, and wake up feeling like the Crypt Keeper with a hangover.

The worst part? None of the solutions you're told to try actually help...

Chaos Calmer contains three key ingredients: Magnesium, GABA, and L-Theanine.

Magnesium helps to relax muscles and produce more GABA in your brain. GABA calms your brain by blocking excitatory signals in your central nervous system (your brain and spinal cord).

GABA is thought to play a major role in controlling nerve responses associated with anxiety, stress, and fear.

L-Theanine is an amino acid that has a calming, grounding effect on the body and mind without making you feel drowsy. This allows you to slash your to-do list in half because your brain isn't scattering in 12 different directions!

Even more amazing is that you can use Chaos Calmer during the day for calm and focus as it decreases overwhelm and anxiety, and at night as it helps you relax, feel calm, and stops the brain spinning to help you sleep deeply. Double win!

Not exactly great solutions are they? Whilst some supplements and medications do offer some relief, the bottom line is that many of them don't target the brainwaves to improve brain function, AND they can come with horrible side effects.

The unique proprietary blend of Chaos Calmer, combined with its topical delivery system, makes it a fast, effective treatment for those feelings of anxiety and overwhelm. No taxing the liver. No peeing out $100 worth of supplements. Just a smooth slide into calm clarity that allows you to bring your A-game to everything from your to-do list to your snooze list!

When it comes to feeling 'tired-wired', you're not alone. Have you ever seen a three year old go from laughing to complete meltdown in .002 of a second? You're feeling the same way, you're just not allowed to have public meltdowns (well, technically, you are!), but you don't.

Chaos Calmer to the rescue! It is safe for anyone over the age of 1 - meaning you can use it when your hubby is stressed about work, your sister is stressed about her kids, and on your grandkids when they're having DEFCON 1 level freak outs.

LaDawnS

✅ Verified Customer

09/20/2023

Works Great!

Got this for my mom who has had a rough time getting to sleep for years. She used it and the first night she said, "I don't know how it worked, but it did!" She fell asleep right away! She is using it every night now with great results!
DG

✅ Verified Customer

09/17/2023

Wow

I love calm when you have trouble falling a sleep this is the product to use. It will help you fall a sleep in abiut 20 minutes. Sometimes my mind wont shut down and calm is amazing
Jules

✅ Verified Customer

09/14/2023

Great!

Love it!
Eileen H.

✅ Verified Customer

09/13/2023

Won't be Without It!

I just ordered my third bottle of Chaos Calmer because I want to be sure I have one one hand. This is a mainstay on my nightstand; ever since I started using it I sleep through the night much better! I've also used it at work when I know it will be a stressful day. It's worked wonders for me, grateful to have found it!
Lori L

✅ Verified Customer

08/02/2023

Chaos calmer

I use this all the time at night when I can't get back to sleep. I also rub it on my legs when they are really restless , it helps so much
Jilly S

✅ Verified Customer

07/19/2023

Added to my Nightime Routine

I love Chaos Calmer. I keep it on my night stand and use 1 pump at night. I sleep like a baby. If for some reason I forget and wake up during the night I just use 1 pump and I'm off to dreamland!
Jane R

✅ Verified Customer

07/10/2023

Too eqrly to tell

I have used Chaos Calmer for less than a week so it’s really too early to comment on its efficacy. Will return in a month.
Gail W.

✅ Verified Customer

06/29/2023

Love this stuff!

I have been using the Chaos Calmer for quite a while now. It works for me 99% of the time. It turns off all the things running around in my head, keeping me awake. I have recommended to a friend at work. She loves it...let her grown son "borrow" it and he loves it. She had to order another one. Also recommended to my sister. She used the full dose once and it stung so she didn't try it again. ( she is sensitive to a lot of things). When I visited, I borrowed a squirt of hers. She tried just a little bit this time and loved it...it helped her relax and sleep.
Lisa J

✅ Verified Customer

06/11/2023

Thanks for the calm!

I'm very much enjoying this product. I use it at bedtime, and it seems to calm my thoughts and help me sleep better.
Kellie K

✅ Verified Customer

06/05/2023

Dot hesitate! Must have!!

It does what it's described to do. I ran out and anxiously awaiting my order.
Sophia M

✅ Verified Customer

04/20/2023

Love this

I am a new user of Parlor Games products; this line was the first I chose to try after extensive research and failed medical appointments and treatments for anxiety and vaginal atrophy symptoms. I am approximately 20-25 years post-menopause. Finally, women's health is getting the attention it deserves. This product is great and so easy to use. It works quickly too. Highly recommend for those anxious moments during the day, in the evening and at bedtime for improved sleep quality, and during the night wake ups or insomnia. Insomnia has plagued me for decades, and this product works better than my experience with any other attempts to get enough rest or feel focused during the day; I discern no side effects. I wish the packaging was more substainable, but understand that it protects and dispenses the product accurately. I have just ordered my second set of Parlor Games products. Also to note, combined with the Vibrant Third product, the two have made a huge change for me, and I am grateful for relief.
Sharon B.

✅ Verified Customer

04/10/2023

Need it

Calmed me down, love it
Lynda G.

✅ Verified Customer

04/08/2023

Best purchase

Clams me when stressed.
Teresa R

✅ Verified Customer

04/08/2023

Calm and Better Sleep

I have a difficult time calming my system to sleep. Chaos Calmer seems to make it easier to fall asleep. I can also use it during stress events to calm down. Great product!
Susan F

✅ Verified Customer

03/28/2023

Really Works for Me!

I've had insomnia most of my adult life and I don't usually get much out of topicals, but this lotion really works to help me relax and "turn off" the day when I get into bed.
Tara A

✅ Verified Customer

03/12/2023

Chill Out, Man

The husband has taken over my Chaos Calmer and I am now almost out and have to buy another! 😂
The magnesium in this product works nicely.
Marsha S

✅ Verified Customer

03/11/2023

Great product

I’ve only used this product a couple of times so far but it’s great!! Helped me get back to sleep after waking up during the middle of the night & my mind wouldn’t shut off. I used this & went right back to sleep!
Angie M

✅ Verified Customer

03/08/2023

Peace finally

I started using this two months ago to hopefully get better sleep. WOW it worked! Not sure how it does it but the calm it produces makes for a nice night sleeping.
Dianne B

✅ Verified Customer

02/25/2023

WOW!

Chaos Calmer goes above and beyond what I expected. I already use a prescription sleep aid, but for years would wake up during the night, and in the mornings around 4:00AM, so I was averaging 4-5 hours of sleep. I needed real, restorative sleep. When I started using Chaos Calmer, I began to sleep restfully thru the night, sometimes waking up in the exact same position as when I went to sleep, at 6:30 or 7:00 AM. I feel relaxed and rested, when before I woke up agitated and restless. I Love This Stuff!!! Thank you!
Dianne B

✅ Verified Customer

02/25/2023

WOW!

Chaos Calmer goes above and beyond what I expected. I already use a prescription sleep aid, but for years would wake up during the night, and in the mornings around 4:00AM, so I was averaging 4-5 hours of sleep. I needed real, restorative sleep. When I started using Chaos Calmer, I began to sleep restfully thru the night, sometimes waking up in the exact same position as when I went to sleep, at 6:30 or 7:00 AM. I feel relaxed and rested, when before I woke up agitated and restless. I Love This Stuff!!! Thank you!
Peggy F.

✅ Verified Customer

02/21/2023

Best sleep ever

I only use this at night and get the most restful sleep!
Jeanie H.

✅ Verified Customer

02/02/2023

Best purchase ever!

I am amazed at how much better I feel while on this. What a difference it has made. I keep busy and volunteer for lots of things just to avoid my home situation! This really does help! I don't know how long it last or is suppose to but I need more!!!
Joy

✅ Verified Customer

02/01/2023

Great product

This cream really helps me sleep and have even used it to help stress during the day. Great find for me.
MaryKay O.

✅ Verified Customer

01/31/2023

My Calming Best Friend

I love Chaos Calmer because it is subtle with safe ingredients. I use it daily and just find it produces a lovely blissful feeling.
c2crazycat

✅ Verified Customer

01/31/2023

Wonderful Product

I have been using Chaos Calmer for several months now. I use it at night, and it really helps me to sleep. I wake up every two hours to go to the bathroom, and then I reapply Chaos Calmer to help me get back to sleep. The delivery is fast, and I don't think I can live without it. I also use other Parlor Games products. Thank you for helping me.
Kay H

✅ Verified Customer

12/21/2022

No More Sleepless Nights

This cream has made it possible for me to fall asleep easily and stay asleep. If I wake up around three or four, and feel like I can't go back to sleep, another little dab of Chaos Calm does the trick! Try it....you'll love it!
Caren C

✅ Verified Customer

12/06/2022

Chaos calmer

First time buying this but if it works as well as Peachy and V3 it will be a winner.
Great customer service, always courteous and on top of things. Will be on subscription Forever.
Janet S

✅ Verified Customer

11/17/2022

Calming

I used a small dose of Xanax for 20 years only at night to help me get restful sleep. Life is better after divorce and moving past trauma. Walked away from Xanax and now use Chaos Calmer.
Debbie H

✅ Verified Customer

11/14/2022

Sweet dreams

Have been using this for a week, I apply every night at bedtime and it really seems to be helping me get to sleep and stay asleep. Thanks
Ginny D

✅ Verified Customer

11/13/2022

Chaos calmer

It really works. Just a small amount on the back of your hands...calming, relaxing. Good stuff.
Cali Girl

✅ Verified Customer

11/12/2022

I’m sleeping like a baby

Since I started using Chaos Calmer 3 nights ago I’ve been sleeping through the night. Before I used to go to bed and stayed awake for 3 hrs tossing and turning. I apply a pump to the back of my hand around 9pm and by 10pm I’m all relaxed and ready to close my eyes, I love it!!!
I wake up rested and full of energy.
Deborah S

✅ Verified Customer

11/09/2022

Calm down

When I get anxious my body feels like it is jumping all over in the inside. Rubbed some on my arms and it calmed down. That was my first chance to use it.
V. Johnson

✅ Verified Customer

11/09/2022

Relaxed and Chill!!!

Takes the stress level way way down. Better than some alternatives! Calm in a lotion is wonderful!
Sheila B

✅ Verified Customer

11/06/2022

Love Chaos Calmer

Love this product! Anytime I get uptight or anxious I use this. It starts working immediately and gives me a sense of calm. It works great for barking, whining dogs and deleting spam calls!!
Give it a try. I also used Peachy Cream and Vibrant 3. Both are great products.
Pamela L

✅ Verified Customer

10/24/2022

Another game changer!

Chaos Calmer is another Parlor Games product that I use every night at bedtime. I have a very difficult time falling asleep and staying asleep. Chaos Calmer helps me to unwind and relax. I am able to fall asleep faster and it does help me to stay asleep. I will not be without Chaos Calmer ever!
Dal c

✅ Verified Customer

10/08/2022

It works

Sleep better for sure, try it!
Irene g

✅ Verified Customer

10/05/2022

It is the best purchase ever

I’m 75 and dealing with all that goes with it. I’m using all 3 products and it has changed my life. I use chaos calmer at bed time and fall asleep without any problem. Thank you ladies you really care
Karen W

✅ Verified Customer

07/13/2022

Use Every Night

The last thing I do before bed is use my Chaos Calmer. I sleep so much better. In fact, I love it so much I just bought some for my sister that is struggling with insomnia.
Carol

✅ Verified Customer

07/11/2022

Chaos Calmer

The chaos calmer is amazing and almost eliminates my feels of stress and anxiety!!!! I would highly recommend it!
Michele S

✅ Verified Customer

07/08/2022

Chaos Calmer

This stuff works!!! Both myself and my husband use it along with our son. I work at a Hospital and our son is an EMT so stress levels are constantly high at work. Do not wait to try this!!!
Eileen P

✅ Verified Customer

07/08/2022

This stuff is amazing and so good for your health!
Michele S

✅ Verified Customer

07/08/2022

Chaos Calmer

This stuff works!!! Both myself and my husband use it along with our son. I work at a Hospital and our son is an EMT so stress levels are constantly high at work. Do not wait to try this!!!
Lisa

✅ Verified Customer

06/02/2022

I have used this every day while I am working when I start feeling stressed and anxious and it is really helping me. I highly recommend that you get on the notification list so you can get it for yourself when it comes back in stock!
Bonnie B.

✅ Verified Customer

05/17/2022

Ladies... as most of us love the peachy cream... and benefits to the Vibrant Third....I just tried their new CHAOS CALMER....and Oh My Gawd... it is another home run for Parlor Games! Hard to explain the state of mind this put me in... AMAZING

Can men use Chaos Calmer?

Yes, the ingredients in the cream can apply to anyone who is experiencing insomnia, anxiety, sleeplessness. There are no hormones in the cream and it is safe for men to use.

Can kids use Chaos Calmer?

Children over the age of 1 can use Chaos Calmer. The active ingredients in the cream are appropriate for children experiencing anxiety and overexcitability. A little known fact is that some food sensitivities or environmental contaminants can elevate levels of glutamate – one of the excitatory neurotransmitters. Elevated levels of glutamate can make it hard for a kiddo to sit down and pay attention. The GABA, l-theanine, and magnesium in Chaos Calmer act to restore balance in the brain.

Does it contain hormones? Can I use it with Silky Peach?

Chaos Calmer contains no hormones. It contains magnesium (a mineral), l-theanine (an amino acid) and GABA (a neurotransmitter). This means it is safe for men and women of any age, and children over the age of 1. It also means you can use it with any of our other products that do contain hormones, such as ReBounce, Silky Peach, or Vibrant Third, as there will not be any hormonal interactions.

Can Chaos Calmer Help Me Sleep?

Difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep can be due to a range of things. When stress levels are high, or when the usual balance of hormones and neurotransmitters has been affected by changes in hormones at menopause, that imbalance between calming neurotransmitters and excitatory neurotransmitters can make it hard to get to sleep and stay asleep. The GABA, l-theanine, and magnesium in Chaos Calmer act to restore balance in the brain and help the brain calm and settle to sleep.

Can Chaos Calmer Help With Stress?

Felt stress – whether it’s real (like a house fire) or imagined (like feeling overwhelmed) usually increases stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. When these levels go up the body has a whole bunch of stress response actions that can then make stress feel worse. The GABA, l-theanine, and magnesium in Chaos Calmer act to restore balance and counteract the impacts of the stress hormones. Deep belly breathing can often do the same thing. Applying the Chaos Calmer can help kick start the calming effect. Chaos Calmer isn’t a long term solution for stress, but it can help in the short term while you learn how to be less affected by events that make you feel stressed.

Does It Help With Panic Attacks, Anxiety & Depression

A panic attack is an episode of sudden anxiety with an exaggerated bodily response to a threat or danger — whether it’s real or perceived. This sudden surge of intense fear or anxiety brings on specific physical and psychological symptoms such as heart palpitations, sweating, trembling or shaking, shortness of breath or feeling smothered, nausea or abdominal discomfort, choking sensation and even chest pain. These often reach peak intensity in just a few minutes. Serotonin, norepinephrine, and dopamine are chemicals that act as neurotransmitters or messengers in the brain. They send messages between different areas of the brain and are thought to influence mood and anxiety level. One theory of panic disorder is that symptoms are caused by an imbalance of one or more of these chemicals. The GABA, l-theanine, and magnesium in Chaos Calmer act to restore balance in the brain.

If you are on anxiety or depression medication, always mention if you have added other nutrients to your daily plan. Meds for anxiety and depression can be great in the short term while you get to the root cause of what is causing you distress. There are some drawbacks to using them long term so do discuss that with your doctor, who can help you taper off gradually. The GABA, l-theanine, and magnesium in Chaos Calmer will supplement what your body is already trying to make to restore balance in the brain. The combination can cause drowsiness so always test it out when you won’t be driving or wielding sharp objects.

Does It Help With Menopausal Joint Pain?

Many women find that after menopause they experience more joint pain. This can be due to changing levels of estrogen and progesterone. Low magnesium can also impact your pain perception as well as cause sleeping problems. Poor levels of this essential nutrient are very common during menopause due to stress and digestive weakness. Sleeping poorly is notorious during menopause and research has proved that sleep deprivation increases our sensitivity to pain. Magnesium is also needed to keep your muscles relaxed, so low levels can cause them to tense up and become tight and stiff, which can impact the muscles that control movement of the joints. In addition to helping calm the brain and supporting sleep, the magnesium and GABA in the cream also help muscles relax and thus, joints are less stiff and sore.

We know that some companies make it hard to cancel a subscription – that’s not us. Our mission is to save the world – one menopausal woman at a time (along with her family & friends)! If you decide you don’t need Chaos Calmer as an ongoing solution for anxiety, sleeplessness, and overwhelm, we understand. Five days before we send your order (every 2 months), you'll receive an email reminder about your upcoming shipment and a link to your customer portal where you can cancel, or push out your next ship date and change your shipment frequency.

Rather have us adjust your subscription for you? Just reach out to us through our "Contact Us" page or reply to any email we send you.

No hunting, no searching, we got you. Respect is where it’s at.

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The Information We Collect

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We use the information you provide about yourself to process your orders and to contact you regarding your interest in Parlor Games’ products. We do not share this information with outside parties except to the extent necessary to complete an order.

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Should you have other questions or concerns about these privacy policies, please send us an email at:

kate@parlor-games.com

Note: Personal information consists of anything that would be used to uniquely identify, contact or locate a single person.

updated 5-25-21

Parlor Games reserves the right to update these policies at any time.

100% Money-Back Guarantee on First Orders

We want you to feel safe and confident trying any of our products. That's why we promise 100% money-back guarantee on the purchase price of the first bottle of any of our products. Balancing hormones DOES take some time, so please try it for 28 days. If after 28 days you are unhappy, or the product just hasn't worked for you, simply contact us and we'll process a refund of your full purchase price upon receipt. Sorry, shipping fees are not refundable.

Refund Policy for All Other Orders

If you order again and then decide not to use the bottle, we accept returns of unopened bottles with the seal unbroken within 21 days of the outbound ship date. Simply contact us, then ship the unopened bottle back to us (we do not cover return shipping costs). Once we receive the returned product in good condition, we will process a refund for the purchase price to the payment method you used at time of order. Shipping fees are not refundable.

Damaged Products

If your bottle was damaged during delivery, you must IMMEDIATELY document the damage by taking a photo of the shipping bag and the bottle. Then, contact customer service to send us the photos of the damage and we will send out a replacement. Bottles damaged during shipping must be reported within two (2) days of delivery.

Shipping Timelines

We do our best to get your order out to you within 1-3 business days, however, for products which are not immediately available in Parlor Games inventory, orders may take longer to ship to you. If your order cannot ship out within 3 days, we will email you to let you know

Incorrect Shipments

If we have shipped you the incorrect product, that’s our bad. We will re-ship the correct product provided you have not broken the seal on the incorrectly shipped product(s). Take a picture of the incorrect shipment and contact us immediately. We'll ship out the proper product and send you a return shipping label so you can return the incorrect product to us. Unfortunately, once you have broken the seal on the product, it's yours to keep, and to replace the product will require you to place a new order.

Missing Shipments

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International Shipments

International shipments do not qualify for any refunds or returns. All international sales are final.

Parlor Games reserves the right to update these policies at any time.

Anxious, Overwhelmed, and You Can't FOCUS

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Say goodbye to stress, sleeplessness, and overwhelm with Chaos Calmer!