Your Cart

No items in your cart

"Ahhhhh. Helps me reground myself in the thick of a hectic day and get some focus on what's really important."
Carolyn K.
Calm, Cool, and ready to Conquer!
Chaos Calmer
Anti-anxiety, brain soothing cream
60-70 pumps - 50ml

When you can't catch your breath, catch a break, or catch up... You need Chaos Calmer. With it's proprietary blend of GABA, L-Theanine, and Magnesium, it takes you from Nervous Nelly to Wonder Woman: y'know, cool, calm and collected (and kicking ass). GABA is a calming neurotransmitter, Magnesium helps relax muscles and helps produce GABA in the brain, and L-theanine is an amino acid which has a calming, grounding effect on the body and mind without making you feel drowsy. Chaos Calmer takes your days from bedlam to bliss.

100% Satisfaction Guaranteed
  • "I'm not counting sheep, I'm fighting sheep."

    "Stress and Anxiety are my new roommates."

    "Relaxation? What's that?"

    "Between brain fog and scatter brain, a lobotomy might be my best option!"

    Sound familiar? You don't need to cut out coffee, run 10 miles, or take up 2-hour yoga classes (though, good on you if you do!), you need Chaos Calmer Cream. This lotion is liquid Zen that can calm the mind, calm the body, and focus the brain.

    Chaos Calmer Cream by Parlor Games is a unique combination of Magnesium, GABA and L-Theanine. With fast absorbency and silky smooth texture, Chaos Calmer Creams' proprietary blend will leave you feeling focused, relaxed, and in control.

    GABA is a calming neurotransmitter, Magnesium helps relax muscles and helps produce GABA in the brain, and L-theanine is an amino acid which has a calming, sedative effect on the body and mind without making you feel drowsy.

    The cream delivery system allows fast action; there is no wasted junk or hard to swallow pills, just good vibes when you need them (ASAP!).

  • How to use
    Chaos Calmer 50ml bottle has 60-70 pumps. One pump can be used if you are starting to feel stressed and anxious. Apply to the backs of your hands and inner wrists. One pump of Chaos Calmer can be used at bedtime and to return easily to sleep after night time waking. Do not exceed 4 pumps in 24 hours. The cream may cause drowsiness for some people, be cautious driving or operating machinery if Chaos Calmer causes drowsiness for you.

    How do I know it’s working?
    As the cream absorbs into the body, most people start to feel a sense of relaxation and begin to breathe deeper. Breathing deeply sends a message to your brain that “all is good, nothing to worry about here” - that’s why Yoga is so focused on breathe work. Applying the cream and sending messages of self love and appreciation combine to center your mind, help clear the mists of chaos in the brain, and let you focus on your priority list with a clearer mind.

    Deionized Water, Caprylic/Capric Triglyceride, Cetearyl Alcohol, Glycerin, Cetyl Alcohol, Isopropyl Myristate, Stearic Acid, Cyclopentasiloxane, Gamma Aminobutyric Acid (GABA), Magnesium Chloride, L-Theanine, Phenoxyethanol, Caprylyl Glycol, Xanthan Gum, Triethanolamine, Dimethicone/Vinyl Dimethicone Crosspolymer, Lecithin, Ethyl Alcohol, Sorbic Acid. Paraben Free
Overall Review Score
  • Mary M.
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Progesterone helps my attitude!
    I’ve become more socially active, more outgoing since starting active 3rd cream. I use it 5 days and take the weekend off. 
  • Cynthia L
    ✅ Verified Customer
    I use this product before bed for greater relaxation after a busy day. It is amazing! I also carry it in my work bag and apply when stressed at work. Helps bring back the calm!! Would highly recommend this product. 
  • Vicki C
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Helps at bedtime
    I like Chaos Calmer at bedtime. I use about half a pump since this product comes out in a large amount. 
  • LaDawnS
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Works Great!
    Got this for my mom who has had a rough time getting to sleep for years. She used it and the first night she said, "I don't know how it worked, but it did!" She fell asleep right away! She is using it every night now with great results!
  • DG
    ✅ Verified Customer
    I love calm when you have trouble falling a sleep this is the product to use. It will help you fall a sleep in abiut 20 minutes. Sometimes my mind wont shut down and calm is amazing
  • Jules
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Love it!
  • Eileen H.
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Won't be Without It!
    I just ordered my third bottle of Chaos Calmer because I want to be sure I have one one hand. This is a mainstay on my nightstand; ever since I started using it I sleep through the night much better! I've also used it at work when I know it will be a stressful day. It's worked wonders for me, grateful to have found it!
  • Lori L
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Chaos calmer

    I use this all the time at night when I can't get back to sleep. I also rub it on my legs when they are really restless , it helps so much
  • Jilly S
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Added to my Nightime Routine
    I love Chaos Calmer. I keep it on my night stand and use 1 pump at night. I sleep like a baby. If for some reason I forget and wake up during the night I just use 1 pump and I'm off to dreamland!
  • Jane R
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Too eqrly to tell
    I have used Chaos Calmer for less than a week so it’s really too early to comment on its efficacy. Will return in a month. 
  • Gail W.
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Love this stuff!
    I have been using the Chaos Calmer for quite a while now. It works for me 99% of the time. It turns off all the things running around in my head, keeping me awake. I have recommended to a friend at work. She loves it...let her grown son "borrow" it and he loves it. She had to order another one. Also recommended to my sister. She used the full dose once and it stung so she didn't try it again. ( she is sensitive to a lot of things). When I visited, I borrowed a squirt of hers. She tried just a little bit this time and loved it...it helped her relax and sleep.
  • Lisa J
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Thanks for the calm!
    I'm very much enjoying this product. I use it at bedtime, and it seems to calm my thoughts and help me sleep better.
  • Kellie K
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Dot hesitate! Must have!!
    It does what it's described to do. I ran out and anxiously awaiting my order.
  • Sophia M
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Love this
    I am a new user of Parlor Games products; this line was the first I chose to try after extensive research and failed medical appointments and treatments for anxiety and vaginal atrophy symptoms. I am approximately 20-25 years post-menopause. Finally, women's health is getting the attention it deserves. This product is great and so easy to use. It works quickly too. Highly recommend for those anxious moments during the day, in the evening and at bedtime for improved sleep quality, and during the night wake ups or insomnia. Insomnia has plagued me for decades, and this product works better than my experience with any other attempts to get enough rest or feel focused during the day; I discern no side effects. I wish the packaging was more substainable, but understand that it protects and dispenses the product accurately. I have just ordered my second set of Parlor Games products. Also to note, combined with the Vibrant Third product, the two have made a huge change for me, and I am grateful for relief.
  • Sharon B.
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Need it
    Calmed me down, love it
  • Lynda G.
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Best purchase
    Clams me when stressed.
  • Teresa R
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Calm and Better Sleep
    I have a difficult time calming my system to sleep. Chaos Calmer seems to make it easier to fall asleep. I can also use it during stress events to calm down. Great product!
  • Susan F
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Really Works for Me!
    I've had insomnia most of my adult life and I don't usually get much out of topicals, but this lotion really works to help me relax and "turn off" the day when I get into bed.
  • Tara A
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Chill Out, Man
    The husband has taken over my Chaos Calmer and I am now almost out and have to buy another! 😂
    The magnesium in this product works nicely. 
  • Marsha S
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Great product
    I’ve only used this product a couple of times so far but it’s great!!  Helped me get back to sleep after waking up during the middle of the night & my mind wouldn’t shut off.  I used this & went right back to sleep!  
  • Angie M
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Peace finally
    I started using this two months ago to hopefully get better sleep. WOW it worked! Not sure how it does it but the calm it produces makes for a nice night sleeping.
  • Dianne B
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Chaos Calmer goes above and beyond what I expected.  I already use a prescription sleep aid, but for years would wake up during the night, and in the mornings around 4:00AM, so I was averaging 4-5 hours of sleep.  I needed real, restorative sleep.  When I started using Chaos Calmer, I began to sleep restfully thru the night, sometimes waking up in the exact same position as when I went to sleep, at 6:30 or 7:00 AM.  I feel relaxed and rested, when before I woke up agitated and restless.  I Love This Stuff!!!  Thank you!
  • Peggy F.
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Best sleep ever
    I only use this at night and get the most restful sleep!
  • Jeanie H.
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Best purchase ever!
    I am amazed at how much better I feel while on this. What a difference it has made. I keep busy and volunteer for lots of things just to avoid my home situation! This really does help! I don't know how long it last or is suppose to but I need more!!!
  • Joy
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Great product
    This cream really helps me sleep and have even used it to help stress during the day. Great find for me.
  • MaryKay O.
    ✅ Verified Customer
    My Calming Best Friend
    I love Chaos Calmer because it is subtle with safe ingredients.  I use it daily and just find it produces a lovely blissful feeling.
  • c2crazycat
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Wonderful Product
    I have been using Chaos Calmer for several months now. I use it at night, and it really helps me to sleep. I wake up every two hours to go to the bathroom, and then I reapply Chaos Calmer to help me get back to sleep. The delivery is fast, and I don't think I can live without it. I also use other Parlor Games products. Thank you for helping me.
  • Kay H
    ✅ Verified Customer
    No More Sleepless Nights
    This cream has made it possible for me to fall asleep easily and stay asleep. If I wake up around three or four, and feel like I can't go back to sleep, another little dab of Chaos Calm does the trick! Try it....you'll love it!
  • Caren C
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Chaos calmer
    First time buying this but if it works as well as Peachy and V3 it will be a winner.
    Great customer service, always courteous and on top of things. Will be on subscription Forever. 
  • Janet S
    ✅ Verified Customer
    I used a small dose of Xanax for 20 years only at night to help me get restful sleep. Life is better after divorce and moving past trauma. Walked away from Xanax and now use Chaos Calmer. 
  • Debbie H
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Sweet dreams
    Have been using this for a week, I apply every night at bedtime and it really seems to be helping me get to sleep and stay asleep. Thanks 
  • Ginny D
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Chaos calmer
    It really works. Just a small amount on the back of your hands...calming, relaxing. Good stuff.
  • Cali Girl
    ✅ Verified Customer
    I’m sleeping like a baby
    Since I started using Chaos Calmer 3 nights ago I’ve been sleeping through the night. Before I used to go to bed and stayed awake for 3 hrs tossing and turning. I apply a pump to the back of my hand around 9pm and by 10pm I’m all relaxed and ready to close my eyes, I love it!!! 
    I wake up rested and full of energy.
  • Deborah S
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Calm down
    When I get anxious my body feels like it is jumping all over in the inside. Rubbed some on my arms and it calmed down. That was my first chance to use it.
  • V. Johnson
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Relaxed and Chill!!!
    Takes the stress level way way down. Better than some alternatives! Calm in a lotion is wonderful!
  • Sheila B
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Love Chaos Calmer

    Love this product! Anytime I get uptight or anxious I use this. It starts working immediately and gives me a sense of calm. It works great for barking, whining dogs and deleting spam calls!! 
    Give it a try. I also used Peachy Cream and Vibrant 3. Both are great products.
  • Pamela L
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Another game changer!
    Chaos Calmer is another Parlor Games product that I use every night at bedtime. I have a very difficult time falling asleep and staying asleep. Chaos Calmer helps me to unwind and relax. I am able to fall asleep faster and it does help me to stay asleep. I will not be without Chaos Calmer ever!
  • Dal c
    ✅ Verified Customer
    It works
    Sleep better for sure, try it! 
  • Irene g
    ✅ Verified Customer
    It is the best purchase ever
    I’m 75 and dealing with all that goes with it. I’m using all 3 products and it has changed my life. I use chaos calmer at bed time and fall asleep without any problem. Thank you ladies you really care
  • Karen W
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Use Every Night
    The last thing I do before bed is use my Chaos Calmer. I sleep so much better.  In fact, I love it so much I just bought some for my sister that is struggling with insomnia.  
  • Carol
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Chaos Calmer
    The chaos calmer is amazing and almost eliminates my feels of stress and anxiety!!!! I would highly recommend it!
  • Eileen P
    ✅ Verified Customer
    This stuff is amazing and so good for your health!
  • Michele S
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Chaos Calmer
    This stuff works!!! Both myself and my husband use it along with our son. I work at a Hospital and our son is an EMT so stress levels are constantly high at work. Do not wait to try this!!!
  • Lisa
    ✅ Verified Customer
    I have used this every day while I am working when I start feeling stressed and anxious and it is really helping me. I highly recommend that you get on the notification list so you can get it for yourself when it comes back in stock!
  • Bonnie B.
    ✅ Verified Customer
    Ladies... as most of us love the peachy cream... and benefits to the Vibrant Third....I just tried their new CHAOS CALMER....and Oh My Gawd... it is another home run for Parlor Games! Hard to explain the state of mind this put me in... AMAZING